I never metaphor I didn’t simile.

1. Porn. I watched a documentary film recently and have been thinking a lot about whether I liked it or not. I found myself saying the phrase trauma porn, as I recounted aspects of it to others. I realize now that what I found troubling, was the film’s insistence on telling incredibly sad stories to elicit an emotional response that wasn’t possible from the mere premise of the primary subject, which in this case, was sound. For example, the filmmaker tells the story of field recording technology, but the field recording he presents was of the mating call of a species of bird who had just lost its last remaining mate. Like pornography proper, I suppose documentary filmmaking is supposed to tell two stories. One is the premise, and the other is the physical reaction a filmmaker wants from your body.

2. Steroids. I prefer crack cocaine to steroids. “It’s club music on steroids,” someone said to me about drill. Imagine it on crack, I think.

3. Nazis. I’m so glad we all love the movie Clueless. I’ll never forget when it came out, that Mike Martinez told me Alicia Silverstone was a feminazi. I sort of knew what he meant, but learned later she is vegan and what Mike thought was a person so dogmatic about one identity was in fact about a person who loved her dogs.

4. I Love You. Subtext.